I'm full of crap: Sunmart 50k review

If you're expecting a post about my ultra distance race this weekend you certainly won't be disappointed. If you're expecting a post about poop, you certainly won't be disappointed.

Friday lunchtime. My friend E and I went out to packet pickup out by the airport during lunch. Since I was coerced by K into running Sunmart I passed on the idea to her, another ultra newbie. I had good reasons for selecting her: I wasn't sure I wanted to run with the friend who coerced me, E had some trouble in last year's marathon that I believe could have been avoided if she'd had a longer run, we were similarly paced, and this 50k was reportedly "laid back and fun." Note: "fun" should not be associated with any run over 15 miles. There is nothing fun about running for several hours. Anyway, E bought what I was selling and here we were, picking up some packets.

I took a picture of our race goodies (at the end of the post), and for an $80 entry fee we made out like bandits. Here's what we got on Friday:

• A huge gym bag
• Polo shirt
• Long sleeve dri-fit race shirt
• dri-fit hat
• sunglasses
• gloves
• nice socks
• a teddy bear (DON'T MESS WITH TEXAS proudly sewn on his back)
• a portfolio
• a manicure kit
• a bandana
• a poncho
• a logo-ed water bottle
• 2 running magazines
• a nice race program
• 2 Hammer Gels

Can you beat that with a stick? For our entry we also could have gone to the pasta dinner on Friday night (and bring a guest), but we opted to skip out on fighting traffic on 45. Instead, it turned out E and I both ate pizza for dinner and met up at 5ish the next morning.

The plan was for me to drive to her place, then take her car to K's house; K was driving 5 runners and a husband up to Huntsville because, well, that's what you do when you're nice and you drive a Tahoe. At E's place I was shocked at how little she brought: her fuel belt, an ID, and a Clif bar. Meanwhile, I had my T1 bag stuffed to the brim with a camelback, extra clothes, extra shoes, Gatorade, bars, gels, first aid, bodyglide, and some lubricating jelly I keep for emergencies (wink wink) (just kidding... it's for long bike rides) (um, awkward!). Anyway, we set off to K's place with E realized she didn't have the bottles for her fuel belt. "No biggie," I said. "I'll call K--she has tons of stuff like that." A short call later K was getting out her 10 oz bottles for E and all was well. 30 seconds later E realized she hadn't brought her number. "Surely you can get a replacement" I thought. Then she realized she had no chip. No chip? Okay now we were in trouble. We were already running a few precious minutes late and I was afraid this current setback would leave us driving ourselves up to Huntsville, not a pretty picture. E frantically called her husband--who never picks up his cell phone--and told him to meet us at K's right away. Somehow we only waited 5 minutes for him before we were off.

E trains like you're supposed to train for a marathon: she owns a fuel belt and does her long runs with HoustonFIT (two things I'll never do). I am not so much into marathon training because I have no respect for the distance even though it's big, and I train out of fear of race failure and a smaller desire to do well. I race to train. I'm cool with that. E is quite the opposite, and this is what I attribute to a non-flaky chick forgetting her race essentials on race morning. Anyway, no harm no foul right?

Huntsville is about 70 miles north of Houston, and I wasted no time in sleeping on my camelback wrapped in my coat (a very comfy pillow) on the way up. Before I knew it we were piling out of the car. While I put on my coat in the chilly 40 degree air I snagged my watch on my sleeve and broke the wristband. Crap. I sulked (I don't do mornings) while we set up camp, headed to breakfast, and watched the 50 mile race start 30 minutes before we were set to go. The breakfast buffet had kolaches, biscuits, sausage, ham, french toast, and a few other goodies for the crowds. I took a biscuit, kolache, and a cup of coffee to top off my 5:30 breakfast of Gatorade AM (ha! I know, I know), a Snickers Marathon bar, and a banana.

Let's pause for poop story #1. E was very concerned about needing to go on the trail, so K suggested taking some Imodium to quiet the crowd, if you know what I mean. I made a big stink about this (being anti-pill except for the occasional Tylenol PM), saying that she just needed to relax and get a good dump in her morning routine and then she wouldn't have to worry about it. I took some coffee to ahem, keep up with my pre-race morning routine. I thought all would be well since it always is. I was wrong.

Anyway, we got to the starting line, the gun went off, we started running, la la la. Since we were about to run 31.1 miles we were in no hurry to push the pace; we were running maybe 10:30 miles. Before too long we were on the out-and-back stretch of single track. E and I were behind these 4 annoying women who kept talking loudly and stopping to take pictures. Cute, huh? Except the entire field was single file on this damn trail and they were holding everyone up. The whole way out I made hand gestures while E laughed behind me. Is there anything funner than making fun of people? I think not. Anyway, we hit the 5k at around 39:00. 39? Holy jeez! The way back wasn't much better as we started our first 12.5 mile loop at 1:17, 15 minutes slower than our expected pace. I kept thinking we'd have plenty of time to make up that first 10k, but the truth is 15 minutes is a lot to make up, especially on trails. Our goal of 12:00 pace wasn't looking bright, and my secret goal of breaking 6 hours (11:35 pace) was even bleaker. Oh well. We were having a good time passing folks and enjoying the aide stations, which had Pepsi products (Mt. Dew was so good), PowerAde (mmm the blue so good), candy of every type, pb&j, energy bars, potatoes, pretzels, peanuts--you name it. We charged the hills on the first loop even though our plan was to walk because we were behind pace and wanted to make up some ground. I was a little grumpy about this hill running, but E kept pushing the pace and I got tired of saying we should slow down-- I felt wimpy. Anyway, around mile 13 I started, well, feeling somethin' heavy while driving in my Chevy. The next aide station I had a private party in the porta-potty that was quite smashing. Post poo we jetted off again to our longest leg without and aide station, 3.22 miles. Man were they the worst miles of my life. The next leg--the 2.79 mile one to the 2nd loop/finish line-- was the second longest pair of miles of my life. Finally we rounded the timing mat for our last 12.5 mile loop at 4:00:00 even... nowhere near our goal, but my consta-pooping hadn't helped matters. We ran in awkward silence for awhile, each assuming the other was mad at our pace till we broke the ice with the "I'm so glad we're doing this" chat. The air was clear for us to enjoy the rest of the race.

Till I had to poop again. This time it was so bad I had to stop and walk for fear of shitting all over the course. I barely made it into the porta-potty, which I sat in so long that someone started asking if I was alright. "No," I thought. "I'm not alright. I'm shitting my brains out and I'm 10 miles from the finish." Finally I took one of E's Imodiums so I could quit the shit. Though my stomach hurt for the rest of the race I didn't have to go to the bathroom, so I guess it worked. Anyway, post poo we continued along at a similar pace we'd held on the first loop, just under 11:00 miles. At 8 miles to the finish E got excited and started 10 minute pace, and I kept up with her for 3 miles. Finally she took off like someone had lit a fire under her ass that was similar to the one lit in mine. In the five-ish miles we were apart (on the worst mental part of the course, too, remember) she gained a nine minute lead on me, and I wasn't even going that slow (I'm thinking near 12:00 pace--it was hard to tell with no watch and no partner with a watch). Okay, maybe I did go slowly after I landed face-first in the dirt, but only for a minute! E finished in 6:48, and I rolled in at 6:57, an hour after I planned and with a 13:26 min/mile average.

Afterward I collected my sweet Sunmart afghan (see the pic) and my finishers medal before hitting the barbecue line. E's husband was there for the finish (and, unexpectedly, to have some of the barbecue) and to drive us home. I was feeling ashamed of getting my ass kicked by E, but I was also very pleased she'd done so well and finished strong... she has potential to be way faster than she is. I also had no room to be competitive at all considering I'd done but one long run of 13 miles when she was grinding out long runs every weekend for the past 2 months. Ya gotta earn it, ya know? Besides, this meant she'd conquered her mental demons; I think she'll have a great marathon next month.
Sunmart goodies:


What was most surprising for me about this race was that my muscles were not my limiting factor--it was my aching feet and grindy knees. I wasn't sore at all on Saturday except for joints, and Sunday I was pretty good except for on stairs (ha! Till I tried running to my car--not my most graceful moment). Monday and today I have a little bit of tightness, but I feel ready to hop into training again. I'm lifting today and continuing a pretty regular training schedule starting tomorrow. If I drop dead soon I'll let you know.